By Chlotrudis Independent Film Society
Rating: 2 cats
Director: Peter Care
Starring: Emile Hirsch | Jena Malone | Jody Foster | Kieran Culkin | Vincent D'Onofrio
Country: united_states
Year: 2002
Running time: 105
IMDB: http://us.imdb.com/Details?0238924
Michael says: “Whoo Boy! I haven’t seen a movie that I’ve disliked this much in quite a while.
“Set presumably in the 70’s, 4 boys in Catholic school misbehave, pay the consequences and grow up a little. Despite a host of unresolved subplots, unnecessary back stories and an over-the-top, pretty ridiculous main plot, that pretty much sums it up. The four boys are writing a comic book with them as the heroes, and their dreaded teacher as ‘Nunzilla,’ their demonic arch villain (played unfortunately, by Jodie Foster, once a talented actress, now a one-dimensional joke with a sporadic Irish accent.) The comic book sequences are pretty flat, and progressively intrusive and unenlightening, and are animated by ‘Spawn’ wunderkind Todd McFarlane (whose bloated, cartoonish comic book work I pretty much despise).
“There’s a little drinking and drugs, a little vandalism, a little animal violence, and a little incest. There’s also a LOT of bad acting. None of the child actors were very consistent, even Jena Malone, who was charming in DONNIE DARKO. Particularly insipid was Keiran Culkin (of the notorious Culkins) who basically had one expression, whether facing an angry and frustrated Sister Assumpta, or mourning the death of a dog hit by a car, and that was a smirk. Emile Hirsch played lead character Francis Doyle with uneven results. The plot was just flat out ridiculous, with rather gaping holes throughout. Particularly the entire cougar subplot.
“I can say two positive things about this picture. Chandler McIntyre had some amusing moments as a stoned park ranger, and cinematographer Lance Acord created some fine, sun-dappled nostalgic scenes a la THE VIRGIN SUICIDES.
“So, if you’re curious to catch this film because you’er a Jody Foster fan, or for any other reason, my advice is to stay far away.” 1 cat
Laura says:
“Four Catholic School friends, Francis (Emile Hirsch), Tim (Kieran Culkin, THE MIGHTY), Wade (Jake Richardson, JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK) and Joey (Tyler Long, THE PATRIOT) escape the perceived tyranny of Sister Assumpta (Jodie Foster) and the varying troubles of their teen lives via their transformation into ‘The Atomic Trinity,’ a pulp superhero comic drawn by three and edited by the fourth. A best friendship is tested when Emile begins to spend time with Margie (Jena Malone, DONNIE DARKO), an unusual girl with a shameful secret, and Tim, the son of warring, alcoholic parents, continues to escalate THE DANGEROUS LIVES OF ALTAR BOYS.
“Based on Chris Fuhrman’s cult novel, ALTAR BOYS succeeds on many levels, but is undermined by a climax that cheats. The film does offer further proof that Kieran Culkin and Jena Malone are fine young actors while serving as a calling card for newcomer Hirsch.” 3 1/2 cats
For Laura’s complete review: “http://www.reelingreviews.com/thedangerouslivesofaltarboys.htm”
Robin says: “Todd McFarlane, creator of the ‘Spawn’ dynasty, is tasked with imagining the super hero stories that fill Francis’ journal and does such a good job I wanted to keep the anime action going. The live action and its various stories are paralleled by the fantasy figures as the boys, as their super characters, take on the evil, motorcycle driving nuns.
“There is a compelling coming-of-age yarn buried under the histrionics of Chris Furman’s story and its adaptation by scribe Jeff Stockwell, but I never got the chance to get my arms around the characters and their plights. There are too many story threads, including one involving a ghost, to be effectively handled. Techs are good (kudos to McFarlane and his animation team) and the young stars convincing.” 2 1/2 cats
For Robin’s complete review: “http://www.reelingreviews.com/thedangerouslivesofaltarboys.htm”
Ellen says: “I have to agree with Michael on this one. I feel guilty for enticing my friends to join me! At one point I thought: ‘I could just walk out right now.’ But, since my friends were with me, I decided to tough it out. Also, I hate to give up on a film if I can possibly make it through. I thought there some amusing moments as the teenage boys pulled their Catholic School pranks, however, they were few and far between. Basically, I found the story line to grow more and more ridiculous as the film wore on. The incest story line got especially hard to stomach and just had zero believability.” 1 cat (or one St. Agatha finger).